Dare You to Move

The title of this article comes from a hit song (released in the year 2000) by the Christian rock band Switchfoot. Years ago, I learned an important life lesson that relates to the title of this song.

My husband, Andrew, and I had planted some wisteria in our yard, and after a few weeks, it became obvious the plant was dying. It had shriveled up and turned brown — without a doubt, it was a failure to thrive.

We noticed we had planted the wisteria too close to the road near our mailbox, so we wondered whether we might be able to save it by simply moving it to a cooler, more peaceful location. We carefully removed the plant (what was left of it) and replanted it closer to the house where there was more shade and moisture, and where the exhaust and debris from passing cars were no longer a hazard. Within a few weeks, the wisteria had sprung back to life and was soon draped in beautiful blooms. Today, after nearly 20 years, that same vine continues to thrive and bloom each season. All it needed was to be moved — transplanted really — to an environment that was more conducive to growth.

Similarly, people should take self-inventory and evaluate whether or not they are thriving in their current environment. The workplace is perhaps the first thing that comes to mind when we analyze whether we're thriving in our environment. Thriving in the workplace should involve feeling appreciated for our hard work, having our opinions and contributions valued, and believing our work is worthwhile and truly making a difference in some way. If we feel we aren't thriving at work, it can affect us negatively in various ways, including our attitude and interaction with others.

Sometimes, thriving at work does not depend solely on the toxic people we may encounter, but how we choose to respond to the toxicity that is sometimes "dished out." It's important to reflect on the negativity we're experiencing and to write it down because this will help provide clarity and perspective. Thriving in an environment may not depend on other people; instead, it may depend on how you are able to filter, react and "move beyond" their ability to control your happiness.

Beyond the workplace, we may discover we are not thriving in our personal relationships with family and friends. Like the wisteria plant in my story above, sometimes we have to move forward with new relationships and friend groups, leaving behind some of the former ones which brought negativity into our lives. And other times, we may discover that the only move to be made is to change our mindset and our ability to allow these toxic people to control our joy.

This past week, I was having an especially rough day, but a resident by the name of Carol Skaull reminded me that, "Tomorrow is new day, a clean slate filled with opportunity. Don't let people rob you of your joy."

What a blessing this was — and a valuable reminder!

Andrew and I love sitting under the canopy of our wisteria vines that cascade over our kitchen stairs. Sipping hot tea and talking about our day brings me great joy. And each evening as we linger there, I am reminded of the essential paradigm shift we have to make physically and mentally so that we can continue toward our journey to joy.