Say Yes (and not only to the dress)

In the 2008 comedy film Yes Man, Jim Carrey plays the role of someone who lived an insular and guarded life, always declining any new opportunity that came his way — relationships, hobbies, trips, you name it. But through various quirky circumstances, he finds himself compelled to start saying "yes" to everything, and his life is enriched as a result.

These days, most of us feel like our "plate is full," our calendars are "booked," and there's simply no time or room for anything more. We may truly believe our daily and weekly schedules are stretched to the breaking point, so our default attitude is to say "no" (or "no thanks," if we're feeling polite).

This is understandable, and I'm not suggesting that we overload ourselves or add to our already hectic and frequently stressful routines. However, what if we try to begin by simply raising our awareness of enjoyable and rewarding opportunities when they arise? What if we start opening ourselves up to activities and relationships that may actually enrich our lives and reduce our stress? What if we at least consider saying "yes" just one time?

You may not even realize how much you might enjoy something until you give it a shot — getting up on the stage for the first time at karaoke night, leading a discussion group, joining a book club, finally introducing yourself to your neighbors, volunteering an hour per month at a local food bank, agreeing to be a judge at the community chili cook-off or Junior Achievement speech contest, or simply taking an evening walk with a friend who needs a sympathetic ear... Perhaps it's watching a short instructional video online about how to cook a certain dish or play a particular instrument. Maybe you finally learn how to draw something besides a stick figure, or you discover a new "life hack" to solve a pesky problem around the house. These activities, and countless others, take little time, and yet they may turn out to be some of the most fulfilling moments you'll experience this year. Who knows? You may discover a new hobby to pursue for many years to come.

Let's say you do follow through and "say yes" to one of the suggestions above. Something magical will happen. Once you try that activity and discover you actually do enjoy it, or you learn a new skill or meet some amazing new people, you'll want to tell and show others what you learned. And that, in turn, will continue to reap rewards and lead to even more opportunities. It's a cycle of positivity that perpetually recycles.

The pandemic of 2020 caused many of us to become more isolated than we already were. Many relationships were severed due to lockdowns and social distancing. Clubs and groups stopped meeting regularly, and many ceased to exist altogether.

While some found new friends and interaction online during the pandemic, many fell prey to loneliness and depression. The pandemic taught us to default to "no." But life is meant to be lived and shared. Opportunity comes most often to those who are "looking" for it. (Otherwise, how will we recognize it when appears?)

We should try simply waking up each morning, taking a deep breath, and reminding ourselves to look and listen for opportunity in whatever guise it may appear. And when it does, consider saying "yes," at least once.